Just call me Nigella!..

Despite the fact that I'm staying in a very Beautiful house and in a very Beautiful country, due to not being able to drive and Canberra being very spread out, I'm a tad bored at the moment. There's only so many times I can walk to the Dinosaur Museum and back, so.. I've been BAKING! Anyone that knows me knows that this is a long and painful process (before I met my Chef boyfriend, I couldn't even cook pasta properly, or an egg!) but I am getting there, and actually getting to be rather good(Ish)

In the last three weeks I've made cakes, cookies, brownies, and today's effort, Banana Bread!

Banana and Sultana Bread

                                                           

Marshmallow, Chocolate and Jam Cake.

                                                  

Mike's Birthday Malteaser Cake!

Apart from Baking, I've also taken up Golf watching. Mike's parents basically live on a golf course, and from the bay windows of the front room where Jacob and I sit and have breakfast and lunch, you can see all the golfers in their funky outfits! (Mike's mum's been known to wave at them in her nightie! ha!) and actually I've began to find it quite soothing, its like constantly having guests, all day. I can hear the buggy's and the chatter and the whacking of the balls. After 4pm when there's no risk of being brained by a golf ball, Jacob and I go out there and look for the Kangaroo's who live in the wild on the course (or Flangeroo's as Jake calls them)

The view onto the golf course, very early in the morning

 

 

 

 

Jacob looking for Flangaroos

So that's us, that's what we're doing at the moment (or at least until Mike's parents get back and I get lifts again!) Although we are heading to Sydney this weekend to stay with friends, visit markets, do the sights and have a drink or fifteen, so I am ridiculously excited.

If anyone's got any good recipes especially for toddlers, do share with me!

Babies; what comes next??

....and then there were three..

Mike's parents (and lovely hosts) have gone away for three whole weeks, leaving us the house to ourselves! considering we've barely had any time together during the last month and a half, this is most welcome!

As much as I enjoy having them around, and I actually really do (we bake, talk, go shopping, go for coffee etc - there's a lot to be said for hanging around retired folk! they're never to busy for you) I'd almost forgotten what its like to live as the three of us. So far its been bliss, I'm going through recipes, planning our return to London (my Dad and sister are viewing a house for us on Wednesday....eeeek!excited!) and I can watch all the episodes of Made In Chelsea I want! *que evil laughter*
However, as much as this lazing around is lovely, I've also been getting my walk on too, which has resulted in losing a few lbs, I've also been arranging to get back into part time work for our return to the great city. I definitely think its time and I really, really do miss working now. With no plans to have another brat (Oops I meant baby...naughty typos, aherm) within the next few years, I would really like to get on some sort of career track, the problem is I don't know what!
Over the years, I've done all sorts. I left home at sixteen and pretty much went straight into hospitality, my first bar job being in Liverpool (first love/boyfriend was at Uni there) and then being transferred within the same brewery/company back to a London (when we broke up) The City Of London to be exact, I ended up working just off Fleet Street and then near St Pauls for around 5 years. Working in hospitality in the city for a long time is certainly an eye opener, I could tell you stories that would put hairs on your chest. Those naughty business folk.
By the time I was 22 I was running my own little Gastro pub in Clapham Common, then in Wiltshire, I loved it and was pretty good at it, I was good at managing people, good at events and marketing, I kept on top of the cash management and good stock control, and I had a bloody good time, meeting some of my dearest best friends along the way.
I then gave it all up for love (hospitality's not great for the relationship, long hours)and to travel to Australia with Mike to meet his family. On my return to London I dabbled with being a PA to the Director of a TV & film production company, I did really enjoy that until the low wages and the fact that the Director was deranged, with a penchant for throwing things at people, put me off.
I then sloped back to hospitality with my tail in between my legs and started working at a place in Fulham that taught ex servicemen how to become chefs and work within the hospitality industry (Mike and I worked on this together) A lot of these men were suffering from PTSD and other issues, so it was certainly a challenge but well worth it when you saw them progress and finish the course (which sadly not a lot did)

After a year, I got made redundant...on the same day I found out I was pregnant. I was swiftly hired by the lovely Sammy at Sammy Duders pottery shop in Clapham and spent probably one of the best summers of my life helping create baby hands and feet imprints in clay and ceramics whilst my belly grew bigger and bigger and I neared towards my due date.

That was almost two years ago, and bar the occasional shift at Mike's old café on New Kings Rd, I've not worked since..... So what should I do?
Hospitality hours don't work with children, try my hand at being a PA again? It's really scary being almost thirty with no solid career to fall back on. Has anyone changed career after having children and how?

I'm excited though, I feel like coming to Australia and having time out from the craziness of London has given me the reality check I needed and got me my mojo back! I know it sounds proper cheesy *passes vom bucket to you* but I really want to make Jacob as proud of me as I am of him.

 

 

 

Me and my munchkin.

 

 

 

My holiday romance.

I am having a holiday romance. We see each other every afternoon, It's my little escape from everybody else, it's a relaxing, so very calming and beautiful romance! My lover? A teeny tiny little village that goes by the name of Ginninnderra!
My god, if I could pocket this tiny little corner of the world and bring it home I would. It's a very old little hamlet that many, many years ago would have been the hub of the community - general store, a tiny old school house and other gorgeous little wooden shack houses with white porches and picket fences. At present it's a little tourist attraction, the school house is a quaint little cafe that sells afternoon tea and yummy fudge, the shack houses are boutique style shops selling gorgeous trinkets, bags, baby bits n bobs. There's an amazing little cupcake workshop that has this shabby chic coolness combined with old style granny home cooking charm, wooden tables stripped bare to their original woods and rickety little chairs painted pastel. There's an ice cream parlour with outside seating on its white panelled porch; the salted caramel ice cream is orgasmic! There's coffee shops, restaurants, surrounded by green trees and pebbled pathways. Much to Jacobs delight, in Ginninnderra, their is even a dinosaur museum! A wonderful independent family run place with the most incredible dinosaur display at the outside entrance.... Jacob is now OBSESSED with Dinosaurs, and runs around shouting 'irosooors' all day every day.



Luckily for us, the museum and the rest of the village is literally a five minute walk away, which is handy as I can't drive and everywhere else in Canberra is definitely not within walking distance. It's my one place where I can go and fully relax, when everyone else is at work and busy, Jacob and I will be up their having a babychinno and a banana muffin.

This place transports me back in time to a historic place where I can use my imagination. I love everything old, old churches, old towns, old houses.

Lush.

Decisions, decisions....

As you all probably know, mike, Jacob and I are all over in Australia at the moment. We are in Mike's hometown of Canberra and are quite frankly having a blast. It's a gorgeous, family - friendly, city, with lovely affordable, family homes, plenty of places for young kiddies, great malls, stylish shops/restaurants/cafes. We came over as we'd had a tough time of late in London. We came over to visit Mike's family, get our heads sorted and to see if we could ever call Canberra home.
I've been with Mike 5 years now and we have always discussed moving here when the time is right. I always said maybe when we have kids, which of course we now have, yet I have still decided that I'm not ready to move over. When I read over the first sentence of this post it's hard to get my head around why I'm not ready? It's perfect , what is there not to like?

The truth is, you cannot be where you do not see yourself being, you cannot force a move when your heart is not in it. How do you compromise when one of you wants to live somewhere and the other doesn't? The pressure on me has mounted so high that I am now backing away from it all, the disappointment in mike's family's faces.. the disdain, the look in their eyes saying "fine, go home, you'll be in a mess again within a few months and don't expect us to bail you out next time"
It's like this MASSIVE fat elephant in the room whenever we are all together and I just don't know how to explain why?

Because I love London, and it's people and its parks, and places and atmosphere and buzz. It's my home.
Because I love my sisters so much, and when its their turn to have babies, I want to be there standing next to them holding their hands and watching their children grow. Not having to communicate with family and friends via a whispered telephone call in the dead of the night due to time differences.
Because, even though Mike and I have been through a difficult patch financially, I want us to prove that we can get back on our feet. We've been blissfully happy in London before and I want to, need to prove to myself that I can do that again, that I don't need to rely on others to bail me out. I'm fiercely independent and do not need people looking over my shoulder and commenting on everything I do.
I don't know if I'll ever be ready. Am I stringing mike and his family along? I sure as hell hope not? Is it normal to be pressurised this much?
Who knows. All I do know is, London, I'll be seeing you on July 15th.